Bad Day Writing
by SarahLiz17
Summary: When I have a bad day, I write to let go of everything. These are very personal, but I want to share my writing. Each chapter will be something short I wrote to calm me down. I'll update as much as I can... but please just know how hard it is for me to publish some of these.
1. Chapter 1

Your mind tears itself apart. Piece by piece, memory by memory. Slowly ripping your soul to shreds, reaching down to your very core. Your deepest thoughts and fears kept bottled up, until your alone... and you let everything flow free. Letting it all penetrate you and your entire being, washing away all hope. You try to forget. Forget everything. Leave this person and life behind. All you want is to start over. Go back to the starting line and hope everything's different. But you can't. The one way to go back is to pass the finish line. You're supposed to walk, but some sprint. The burning in your lungs, the fiery pain in your muscles. Bright lights and everything's moving too fast. Time moves rapidly as you wonder what lies past the finish line. Tears burn at the edge of your eyes and you can't help but think, _what has become of me? Where is the old me? The calm girl with not a single worry in the world, not even half way through the race, simply walking._ Just a shell left. Everything that has made you you has washed away with the memories you tried to forget. You don't want to be this way, but there's nothing you can do. Useless... helpless... worthless. With one last gasp of air you cross the finish line. You were faster than you should've. Ahead of everyone, you leave everything you've ever known, loved, and hated behind. Relief flood your thoughts and you realize you feel lighter. And for once, you even feel happy. Everything falls away, or maybe the other way around. You are engulfed in darkness, and slowly your memories fade away. The one thing you have wanted for so long has finally come. You're free.


	2. Chapter 2

Drowning. Some force pulling you down. You blindly reach for help, but you simply slip. Screaming and crying for someone... anyone. But you realize, nobody is gonna notice you. You're invisible, silent, worthless. Nobody cares, all they do is lie. They say you're important, that you are beautiful and smart, but deep down you know the truth. The cold, harsh truth. Slowly sinking further and further, until you finally open your eyes. Bright fish and coral, plants gently swaying back and forth. Everything calm and beautiful... too perfect. Mesmerized never wanting to leave, you feel uneasy. Whenever you're happy, you simply wait. You know it's gonna happen. The calm before the storm. And sometimes, you make the mistake of forgetting. You get too comfortable, and then in a flash all of the bright colors turn to black. You're pulled back down again as your lungs burn. Your body tells you it needs air, but you don't care anymore. You're not dead, but you're not exactly alive either. You stop fighting. Leaving the harsh world above you, you sink down into the darkness of the waves. Letting yourself be engulfed in the blackness of the water. Numb to all emotion, you no longer care. And slowly... all your thoughts fade away.


	3. Chapter 3

Voices screaming in your head. Screeching horrible words over and over and over making your head burn. A stabbing pain ripping your skull in half. But the physical pain is only half of it. Emotionally, you're tearing yourself apart. The voices take everything happy and rip it away from you. You try your best to hold on. Save that one last sliver of hope, but the voices show no mercy. They take everything away... the light that used to shine in your eyes, your laugh, your smile. The simplest things. A couple words as you pass, a kind touch from a friend, can send your spiraling into this deep hole. You fall deeper and deeper, and once you think you've hit the bottom, the floor drops out and you continue falling. You claw at the walls, scream for help, and occasionally you'll find a small ledge to hold yourself on. But everything must end at some point. You body aches as your fingers slip once again. A constant cycle of swirling emotions. You see everyone around you and wonder, _why me? Why am I falling while they can float?_ Stuck in this never ending hole you hope someone hears you silent cries and pleas... but nothing. Until you finally see a small light above. A hand. You grasp it and hold on with all your might. Struggling to hold on, hoping that what you've been through has been enough. Hoping it all might come to an end. The hand pulls you upward and again, all you feel is hope. But slowly, you start to slip. The hand starts letting go. You scream once again for help... but no answer. Before finally the hand pulls away sending you plummeting down, down... down back into the deepest darkest places of your mind. Only the voices there to keep you company.


End file.
